Love and therapy

I've missused a word to describe myself, .... I'm not a psychiatrist, just a therapist. A NAIVE therapist to the effect. I'll tell you why later.

I've just listened to the whinings of a passenger who's sitting beside me on a bus journey back to my hometown. Somehow he just told me about his business, his frustations and how it has affected his family. The trick? I just kept quiet. That's it! You don't have to be very charismatic and influencial to get people to talk. I remember from an article that says something about dealing with friends --> "Sometimes the best way to be a friend, is to keep quiet". And I think it's quite true. Remember how Robin Williams got Matt Damon to talk in 'Good Will Hunting'? He just kept quiet, and the 'Will' character won't talk, for 60 minutes of therapy session.... everyday. Until, one day Will breaks down and started talking (not before some few arguments). It's a surefire technic.

Back to business, how does the ability of listening and basic therapy knowledge help and involve in a love relationship. The answer is 'nothing'. I have a crush in an Indian girl years back, and stupid of me, I didn't take any action and let a Punjabi fellow get to her first. And almost everyday she will call me and tells me how stupid her boyfriend is, how inconsiderate, how uncaring,.... "I wanna break up!!" ...... and last one will be the next topic I shall start about. On topic, do not think that being there for someone who is in the middle of a heartbreak situation can guarantee you some pussy. It doesn't work all the time. Some of them just want to whine and cry about it to someone, and not expecting anything from it. In fact, those same "some of them" will be as jolly as a bird the next day, and went straight back to the uncaring and heartbreaking bastards. This girl here, knows how much I care for her in a more-than-friendship level, yet she still comes to me when she's down. I will do my entire best to cheer her up, giving advises after advises, telling her that her boyfriend is "not really that bad, you know" and stuff. She will cry and she will shout, and then she will smile again. But after all that she leaves, leaving me heartbroken everytime...

It's been years since I last saw her. News has it, that she's getting married this year. Not to the same Punjabi fellow, but a Singaporean. She rarely calls me now. I guess she FINALLY realised it. I'm not saying that it's bad to have an attachment to someone to whine to, but at least show some appreciation with pussywords at least, to someone who has been there for you when you're down, and to draw the line before any emotions are stirred.

.....but I will never ever touch another Indian woman again.....

Star gazing

An excerpt from a 1996 japanese soap, it's a conversation between the hero and the heroine up on a rooftop of a flat, a cold night..... the hero (coming off from a break-up with his girl) speaks first....

"hey, there are stars in the sky...."
"yes there are... we just can't see them in the daytime"
"they're beautiful isn't it?"
"...mmm.... yes they are..."
"...and there are darkness around it too, yes?"
"...yeah?"
"...i'm just thinking. Darkness exists so that the stars may sparkle and be pretty..."
"...huh?..."
"....i guess i'm that sort of person,.... what do you think?"
"...*pfft*...you poet!.."


I remember this well, cos it kinda reflects my life.....
....try and guess which drama this excerpt comes from... ;)
Hint: the guy is a pianist, the girl is a model

Whining down

So what's been happening? Well, my life sucks, my jobs sucks, my girlfriend is mad at me, my landlord sucks too.....! These are the so common stuff that we hear the guys whine about themselves over a few bottles of Two Dogs, (Chocolate Latte for the ladies). Whining is good, all the better if you can find someone to whine to. It heals the soul, supplying some measure of comfort in the much busy and hurryburry life in the city. I for one, have no one to whine to, (except to God).

I have been playing the role of the "listener" for many people since the day I can speak English properly (that's way back in high school). A friend has revealed to me years earlier that I have the sort of charisma and aura, that can make people talk, and tell their problems to me. No matter what, people will tell me things. Even if they are the seclusive and quiet sort, they will tell me. Why, I can still remember a certain friend back in high school seeking me for advice of love, when I haven't held a girl's hand in my life at that time. Eventually the 'patients' pile up.

Tis' a lonely experience being the 'listener' for so many years. While it's sometimes enjoyable to listen to their experiences and stuff, but it's not a two way conversation, it never was and will be. How can you tell a person who's been telling you about their love problems, about your own problems of debugging a goddamn SQL script? (ahh~~ that feels better).

I don't have many friends, people look to me as a cheap psychiatrist. Most people view psychiatrists as boring people, and would rarely fit into a wild and wacky group. Obviously, they haven't seen me drunk.

I believe it's a calling for me, to become a "supporting actor" to someone else's mega-movie life. The eternal sidekick that provides an amount of sanity back into the heroes and heroines. I've always love the concept of underdogs and sidekicks. Staying behind the shadow of successful people has a certain enigma to it...... Or i was just pessimist.