Merry Christmas to Everyone! ^_^

Merry Christmas to everyone!

Had a great Christmas morning. Usually I don't look forward to Christmas mornings, because I have to get up early in the morning to prepare for mass. I prefer lazing around me bed, wrapping myself in my blanket in the cold, and chilly morning. But it was worth the trouble.

Actually we saw some great things in church since yesterday. Last night we went for the usual weekend sunset mass. And where we sat, a young lady had pushed in an old man, with tubes still attached to his nostrils and wrists. He was clearly half dazed there, but I think he knows where he was. I've seen this old soul before, he was always there at the right wing, in a wheelchair pushed by his daughter (presumably) but this was the first time I saw him in half-conscious state and with tubes. Father Rudy (redemptorist priest from OMPH) descended from the altar and came to his wheelchair for a special blessing for him, which afterwards he addressed to the congregation that THIS was a miracle and an example to be learned. His message in his sermon and closing homily is to look deep in our hearts for a reason, to find joy even during our darkest times. This, I agree very much... only a couple of days since I posted the story of my injury history, and Father Rudy pretty much summed it up for me.

This morning, more elderly, blind, and sickly people came for the Christmas morning mass. Father Michael Cheah was more than glad to come down from the altar as well, to present the Eucharist to those who have trouble moving around. Mama said to me that she wished that Ah Poh (grandma), though sickly, could have done the same. Ah, but... I know Jesus would have came to her room anyway. Though it could have been good for her to come to church, which she didn't for the last how-many years. Excuses? I don't know, that's between God and her.

I called up an old friend from Catechism class after mass, and set up a meeting with her. Gosh, she was still as beautiful as the last time I met her. She's single now. Anyone who wants her number can call me, but please remember to attach a cheque thereafter.

Then I called up another dude who was supposed to meet up with me for drinks last week. Haven't met him for some time already. So I'm roping him in, because we were Catechism classmates too (as is my fiance). This will be a cool reunion. ^_^



However, my Christmas present was given away. That was the only casualty.

The gramaphone that I wanted to pick up during this weekend, was given away to some fellow. It seems that the new owner of our old house gave the gramaphone set to the contractor (who was renovating the house), and in turn shipping it to another person. Papa and Mama was throwing blames at each other, while I, though disappointed, said that's it's fine. Shouldn't really claim back an item that was given away, sounds silly anyway. Papa was adamant, in spite of me asking him to give up, he stubbornly asked the new owner for numbers so that he can try to get it back. What a bloody waste of time.

I was cool about it, really. But what pisses me off is that Papa putting up some effort when it was already GONE. If something was to be done, it could have been in AUGUST, when I said I wanted it. Now it's making our family look like a bunch of laughing stock. *sigh*. I blame myself for not taking charge of the situation. Maybe the gramaphone set would have been around if I asked for the numbers a couple months back.

Now, I'm blogging, Papa's in the kitchen washing something and Mama's sweeping the hall. We're all obviously in a bad mood, and we're finding something to do, just to occupy our mind. :)
.... Well, you gain some,.... you lose some.... :)
Overall it's a good Christmas. Hope you had a merry one too.


Happy Holidays everyone!
Peace to all ^_^

Real "Benefits" of Smoking...

Related post: Smoking Benefits...


In a previous discussion, I mentioned about the real "benefits" of smoking. Guess what? There ARE beneficial side of inhaling the intoxicating nicotine through your lungs. No, it's not only having the oh-so-old remark of looking cool while leaning back and sitting cross-legged, left palm on lap, right arm draped on back rest of the couch with a ciggarette between your middle and index finger. That's old. I now present you some of the cooler things you can have when you smoke.

Create Clouds
Gather a group of buddies and make clouds together. A great way to create a "highland" atmosphere at any time, while having a chance for quality time with friends. Works best at closed compartments.

Better Tastes
Oversmoking kills the taste buds on your toungue. Rendering you near immunity to spicy and strange tasting food. Impress your friends with your power of resistance to spicy food and curry. If you're a man, your wife will never ever notice that you hate her cooking experiments anymore.

The Sympathetic Unwell Person
Bring out the mother-instinct in women, watch them get closer to you with the great look of concern on their face reserved only for you. (Yeah, we men love those) Don't worry about the coughing stuff, this will make women care for you more. There are many types of disease and side effects you can get for smoking. Among the popular ones are bronchitis, coughing blood, asthma, and Parkinsons. Remember that Mohammed Ali has two wives. By the way, this works well for women too.

Terminal Disease
Related to the point above, there are more dangerous disease which you will get after prolonged smoking. Lung cancer, heart disease, pneumonia etc. Coupled with lies about your Donald Trump-like wealth will soon attract the young and beautiful to your side like moths to fire, thinking that they will benefit from your demise some day. Sure, they'll find out later, but in the meantime you will have lots of fun and pleasure. Works well with the next point.

Dry Skin & Wrinkles
Get that great mature, elderly look in your face and skin for that rugged sexy look. Like David Carradine, Sean Connery, Richard Gere, Jack Nicholson and company. Your bronchitis will further complement you with that husky voice for the complete effect.

Blackened Lips
YTour lips will gradually turn dark after many years of smoking. It's faster if your frequency is higher. Forget about lipsticks and coloured lip balms. Smoking will give you a super-cool natural-looking black lipstick effect that will last forever. Want a real gothic and mod-look? Grab that ciggy now.

Yellow Teeth (with Gum Disease)
Smoking causes the tar and smoke stick to your teeth, rendering it with beautiful yellowish ochre. Perfect for an all natural Halloween disguise for a convincing look. Also good if you always wanted to look like a real hillbilly.

Dragon Breath
In addition to the above point of yellow teeth, higher levels include decaying of teeth. Because tar and smoke are highly acidic it will slowly eat up your teeth. IF that does not happen, your alveoli and bronchial tubes within your lungs will be so polluted and damaged you will emit a natural foul smell every time you open your mouth. Now you will breathe a powerful yet foul and funky stench that will forever keep your safe from muggers and pickpockets. Handy, isn't it?

Aliens for Babies
Are you an alien lover? Wanna be the coolest guy in town with a baby that looks like the Zerg or Ninja Turtles? Start smoking and have your sperm start to deform and degenerate, and even cause your hormones and chromosomes to mutate. Helps if your wife does it too, to speed up the effect. Be aware of the inevitable impotence, stillbirths, miscarriage, premature birth and SIDS, so act fast while it lasts. Sounds risky, but hey, think of it as an investment. You may end up with a potential science fiction movie child-star where producers will love to have, to save cash on make up and special effect.

And finally...
Reduce Lifespan
Help yourself, and help your country. Reduce the ever-growing population by dying early or killing other people with your smoke. This will lessen the country's burden and free-up annual budgets from smoking-ban campaigns. Ultimately it helps to reduce taxes too. What better way to server your country, and serve your own interests at the same time? (However, if it causes the country to raise taxes on other utilities to make up the deficit, blame your country's government)

Don't forget the social qualities that come with it. Namely:

Ciggarette Hierachy System
In Malaysia, the brand of ciggarettes that you smoke may reflect your social status. It may be due to the price of ciggarette brand, or the commercial popularity of it. For example, people who smoke Dunhill are considered well-to-do. Marlboro are a favourite among the chinese and range from yuppie groups to techno geeks. While the Gudang Garam may reside on mostly construction workers and low-paid labours. Show off your social credentials today!

Cool Zippo Lighters
For people with glasses, the dramatic "take-off" will swoon girls who are looking for the classic sympathetic broken man, waiting to be hugged. Smokers have a reason to sport cool Zippo lighters legitimately. Use the head-turning flicking action that will grab the attention of the hot chick at the corner of the tequila bar instantly. That's not all, some designs come hand-warmers and play music. Absolutely irresistable to women. Get lucky today!


Footnote: The above article is only a jest, to coincide with my mission to quit smoking, and should not be taken seriously as "benefits". However, the medical effects and side effects are true. (Yes, I'm not joking about the alien babies part). So be warned.


"A pinch of tobacco, wrapped in paper. A fire on one end, a fool on the other."--Mark Twain

Smoking Benefits...

OK, firstly, I want you guys to be clear about one thing - Smoking Is Bad. And I knows it. But yes, there ARE benefits of smoking too.

A lot of people has asked me why I started smoking and why didn't I quit since I know it is bad and all. The fact is, I can actually stop smoking at any given time and I can last for months or years without it. So why?

Before I explain, let's go way back to my school days. Some of my friends around me smoke when not within the school compound. Does it make me curious? Not at all. In fact, it looked awful to see a kid in school uniform smoking a cigarette in a town bus. Plus it drains your stamina, which is very bad for me because I was very active in sports. That's why I was never tempted and graduated high school without a single puff.

During my high school days, I was Orchestra Leader in the Chinese Instrumental Group. Sometime after graduation, I was invited back by my juniors to watch the national chinese instrumental group competition in Penang.(It was going to be history, because the following year they would take part of it, it's a FIRST. So they decided to watch the show, to see what they're up against.) I was there to counsel and provide adult supervision to those kids. After the show on the first day, I hung out with a junior and long time friend Carson, at the balcony. He was smoking away and we had a nice talk about our musical group.

Now, as I mentioned before, I often have people pour out their souls to me, telling me their life story naturally, and he was no different. (I don't want to brag, but I just have this aura that makes people tell me things :) ). I love listening to stories about other people so I let him talk. But mid-way through our conversation, when it comes to personal details, he just wouldn't commit further after that. So I tried another approach, I took one of his cigarettes and lit it. I could never forget the look on Carson's face, while exclaiming "Hey! I didn't know you smoked too!". It's as if he found a long-lost brother.:) So then, he opened up, and told me everything about himself from his childhood till his present days.

Side note: That was actually my first puff. And surprisingly, I didn't even choke or cough from the smoke going through my trachea and lungs for the first time. It seemed...natural. As if I had been smoking for a long time. (Which is one of the reasons why it seemed convincing to Carson) All these years of thinking "i wonder how it feels to be smoking" and the conclusion that I get is..... dissapointing. It was nothing really. Other than the slight high you get in your head after each puff, it was a waste of time.

Many years after that, I took from this experience with me when I started working. I find that it helped me a great deal where ever I go.

On my first job I worked at a Civil Engineering company, where I was site supervisor, I was in charge of inspecting the R.C. frame contruction. Same thing -> the contractor talked with me professionally, nothing more. Then I took one of his ciggarettes, and he began to tell me about his wife, and kids automatically .... and also where he cheated on the materials. (I later advised him to repair it, because it may cause the building to collapse, in which he obeyed willingly). Every visit to the site, he would indulge lots of tips and tricks of the building construction world to me, and I learned a lot. I did the same to my peers, the trainees, the site workers, other engineers etc. And I get positive results and "inside stories" on just about anything, related to work or not. A year later, I was many years ahead of anyone with the same position as I am in terms of knowledge and skill. Thanks to my secret weapon - the cigarette. I didn't only use this at work, even at social functions. It's a sure-fire icebreaker.

The reason behind this is simple:
Smokers are shunned in the eyes of the society. You see a kid smoking - it's a teen-gangster. You see a man smoking - he's crude and rude. You see a women smoking - she's a tramp and a vamp. You always see "No Smoking" signs everywhere. Parents see smoking as a weakness. The image of smokers are never nice here in Asia.

By pulling out the cigarette and smoking with them, they feel as if they found another comrade in distress. Smokers are like a groupie of their own. As a result of this exclusion, smokers tend to group in certain places e.g. fire escape stairways, lobby areas, smoking rooms etc. And it is in these "smoking meetings" people meet and talk, because it's rare you get a break like this. Now the "comrade in distress" mentality does not take place all the time, but it's the opportunity to meet people that counts. Sometimes business propositions may even take place. I have rubbed shoulders with many CEOs and Execs at stairways where we learn about each other's businesses.

Additionally, smoking gives me an excuse to take a few minutes of my work, go out and take few minutes break. Now office administrators deemed that this is a sign of low-productivity as it takes time off from work. But I consider this as a lower offence compared to other "crimes" such as repairing make-up, getting up to make coffee often, long breaks at the pantries during tea-break, surfing porn when no-one is looking, checking (junk) mail, walking around looking for chat-mates, checking/sending personal SMS, etc etc.

So do you still think that these are reasons enough to be called "benefits of smoking?". Well, these are just my personal experience on how smoking have benefited me. :)

And actually, I'm in the midst of a resolution to stop smoking now. Because my current work does not require for me to smoke at all. (I'm a system administrator and programmer now, and my job requires me to be on my desk at most times. So I don't get to meet people outdoors much) Hopefully it pans out this time.

I'll be starting on another blog entry on other ...err.... "benefits" of smoking. I'll let you decide on that one. :D